Marginalia (F)

Teddy died from complications brought on by pancreatic cancer. 

I never thought much about the pancreas before.  I mean I knew about the blood sugar connection. Insulin. Sure. Weighs about 3 ounces or so. I know that now. I even read up on Herophilus.

I thought I wanted to know everything about the pancreas.

I didn't.

Hospice came in when Teddy made the decision to stay home no matter what. 

Now I can tell you about Dame Cicely Saunders. And Florence Wald. And Elisabeth Kubler Ross. And Senators Frank Church and Frank E. Ross.

Senator Church died from a pancreatic tumor. He was the last Democratic senator from Idaho. 

Teddy and I had been married for three years when Senator Church died. We watched his funeral on t.v.

Jilly--across the street Jill--her sister Beth came to see us and talk to us about hospice care. Teddy asked about Medicare but was mostly quiet. 

Beth had a funny accent. I didn't ask about that. 

When we moved here people asked me where I was from all the time. Huntsville, I would say. Huntsville, they would ask. Alabama, I would say. Oh, they would say.

Sometimes I would mention the rocket science center. Wasn't important after awhile as more folks got to know me. Teddy would just laugh when I fussed about. You married a Yankee, he said, what did you expect. 

It hit home when he stopped eating. Beth said that would come soon enough. 

Then it clicked. Of course. Jilly told me they were from Montreal and Beth just moved here last year. 

Beth's husband is an orthopedic surgeon. The college football coach met him at some conference and sold him on the idea of moving here. 

Not that our team is special. But it's something I guess.  

Teddy liked going to the games. He never asked me to go. He liked the basketball and baseball games. I think the baseball team won the conference a few times.

I'm not up on all that much on sports. 

Johnny and Lindsey were flying in from Chicago the day Teddy died.

Beth noted time of death as 9:47 am, October 12th, 2024.

Johnny and Lindsey left the kids with her sister Karen. Karen didn't have children so that was going to be interesting. 

Teddy opened his eyes and looked right at me and I squeezed his hand. His mouth opened slightly and he exhaled. His eyes closed and Beth said he's gone now. 

And now he's gone.

Lyman 2024

 

 

The (Un) Happy Prognosticator

Perhaps the west coast of Florida will suffer another hurricane strike this year. If so, where I can't say.

Maybe teenagers are better off if Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut is no longer available in public school libraries. I should know after including it in my English courses half a dozen times or so. I don't.

The DJIA at the close of the day on April 30, 2025? I suppose if I guessed at the number a thousand times, I might get lucky. 

I try to remind myself that the words possible and probable are not synonymous.

Will the San Andreas Fault falter finally in my lifetime?

Should I invest in a rental house at Rodanthe, NC? By the way, I'm 71.

The week Beyonce's "16 Carriages" was released I touted it as Song of the Year. Of course I still think Jackson Browne is worth listening to these days.

There is a need for speculation as we plow forward into our lives. No doubt. No doubt. But fields beyond our purview?

Will tonight be my last to lay my head down and go to sleep? 

I guess the arms industry is pleased by the cat and mouse affair that exists between Iran and Israel. See how easily punditry comes, and I'm no pundit.

Let me unlearn the impulse to speak upon things I can't know. And, the things I don't know.

Frost wrote of the world to either end via fire or maybe ice.

That question is so far above my pay grade that, well, I'm not even on that pay scale.

Eliot suggested a whimper rather than a bang. 

Now that I think of it, let it be a bang.

Guardrails

That our Constitution ratified in 1789 demanded compromise and a leap of faith is well documented. Forging a national consensus from a swirl of dissenting viewpoints and determination to block the rise of tyranny created the set of guardrails that some now complain is too restrictive.

Three governmental branches. Two legislative bodies. Checks and balances. Checks and balances. Check and balances.

Pretty heady stuff in 1789. 

All to diffuse power and keep our nation free from despotism. If.

If those in power honor the spirit of those guardrails. Thus, the leap of faith. 

Of course our challenges are daunting. The frustrations are real. The viewpoints diverse. It's a great big complex world out there after all.

Election sloganeering may be appealing, certainly. And vitriol, unfortunately. And bombast, apparently. And. And. And.

As I see it, I would rather we slog through the constitutional process toward a more perfect union than see the rise of an American Putin or Xi Jinping or Khamenei or Orban.

And so I am with James Madison: "The accumulation of all powers, legislative, executive, and judiciary, in the same hands, whether of one, a few or many, and whether hereditary, self-appointed, or elective may just be pronounced the very definition of tyranny".

All nations are an experiment in ideas. Ours is no different. Perhaps tomorrow's vote may be a watershed moment.

May our constitutional republic always reign.